Monday, December 5, 2011

Trimming the Tree and Some Dress Sizes

Before the wedding Jeremy and I were both committed to losing weight. We set a goal, and we both reached it before we left for our honeymoon. Yay us!

Then we gained back like, 15 pounds each. Because while we walked everywhere, seriously we walked almost everywhere, we also ate whatever we wanted and... walked everywhere. Walking is not the slimming exercise everyone would have you believe. You tone, true, but you also build muscle which can read as weight gain. Which is fine if you're a dude, but if you're a girl trying to slim down building muscle sucks.

I'm not happy with the wedding pictures or reception pictures because I have this weird pouch thing happening. I guess bloating would be a better term, cause it's higher up than a pouch would be. I'm not a kangaroo or anything, but I feel like I could have looked slimmer. And that's entirely my fault. (Also, everyone who didn't tell me and/or buy me Spanx.) The last holiday picture of Jeremy and I, we both look gross. We saw it and immediately made sounds of disgust at our own images. So we're trying to slim down, together. Again. Maybe this time we'll stay fit until we have kids.

That's my ultimate goal. I want to be about 20-30 pounds lighter when we get pregnant, this way I can gain some healthy baby weight and then make Jeremy stay home with the kid after it's born and I can hang out at the gym 2-4-7. Also, I told Jeremy he's not allowed to gain sympathy weight. That's crap.

Realistically, I just want to fit into the bridesmaids dress I wore for my brother's wedding. That would be B.A. I'm concerned it'll have to wait until after the holidays, only because no one seems to know how to make healthy dishes at this time of year. 'How much does this recipe call for? All the butter in the world? That seems fine.' But if I have no willpower to say no to one more cookie, there doesn't seem to be much hope for the rest of the year, does there? That just won't do. Eff you holiday baking. No means no!

So this holiday, since we're both trying to lose weight, we're committed to keeping each other committed. He's my support, and I'm his. Seriously, it was in the vows: 'I promise to tell you you're pretty when you think you're hideous and compliment your slim and at the same time womanly curves because I know how much it means to you to be fit but still feminine and healthy.'

I wrote them myself.


In related news, (read the title, it's related) we aren't putting up the tree this year. For starters, I hate artificial trees. They creep me out. Also, ours is stored in the basement all year and I don't like to think of the spiders and whatnot we're bringing up into the apartment when we let that tree back in. So instead I'm going to build a tree out of ornaments. It's going to be terrific and sparkly, just like Christmas. With lights and garland and it'll hang from the ceiling so there's no chance the dog will knock things off with her insane tail. Oh! I have to buy Christmas cards... I just remembered that. There's no relation here except that I'm on the Christmas subject.

Also unrelated, it's 3:14 in the afternoon and I still haven't showered. This overnight thing is really messing my schedule.

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