Weight Issues. What's New?

Got out my summer clothes to make myself feel shitty cause I like the abuse. Not really, but it's hard not to think that's why I did it. I knew full well none of those clothes would fit me cause despite my best efforts I've managed to tack on approximately 10-15 pounds since last summer. I guess I was just hoping they would fit a little better than they ended up fitting even if they were still too small. A few pairs of shorts weren't  completely god awful, and one bikini still fits well, but everything else? I definitely need to lose about 10 pounds before summer. That or buy a whole new summer wardrobe.

I keep getting asked if I've lost weight, which is nice since I'm trying to (cause I hate my body, like every other woman alive), but I haven't so when I say no they disagree with me. Like I would lie about it. How do I benefit from that? I don't understand this concept. Sometimes I just wear more flattering clothing. I try to dress for my body, but it's that weird shape, where it doesn't fit into hourglass or pear but it's somewhere in the middle. Whatever. I have a pretty nice ass so if nothing else, ya know. That.

I would rely on my intelligence and humor, like I've done all my life, but I find more and more that people are intimidated by it, or flustered by it, or in the case of my humor, don't always get it. That's frustrating for me. A friend recently told me she was nervous to talk to me when we originally met because I seemed so smart and she didn't want to sound stupid. She's over that now obviously, cause we're friends, but I hope when she said she was over it she meant being nervous to talk to anyone that seemed smarter than her. Guys, smart people want friends too. Not a lot of them, cause we aren't very social people. But some. Some friends. Who are also smart. I have those friends. We talk about you when you're not around. (JK... but seriously.)