It's De-lovely

Everyone keeps asking about the honeymoon. I get that we were gone for two weeks and they may actually be interested in how the trip was but I feel that people are asking so that they can tell me what they did while I was gone. And then they're disappointed when I don't ask them how their... normal routine was. Selfish bastards.

Another thing people keep asking is what kind of food we ate. Someone actually asked me if we sampled the local cuisine. ... We went to Wales. It's in the United Kingdom, where they pretty much eat what we eat, with a bit more focus on prawn, leeks, and curry. They actually have prawn cocktail flavored crisps. And their food is labeled differently. Which is something I keep wanting to talk about with people but they never let me get there. So...

Things that are similar but with different names (I'm sure there's a word for this.):

• M&M's - they call them Smarties. They don't seem to have our version of Smarties.
• Lays Potato Chips - Walkers Potato Crisps. And the colors of the bags are different too! The salt and vinegar bag is green. I almost didn't buy them at first glance because I thought they were sour cream and onion. That flavor doesn't seem to exist, instead it's 'aged cheddar and onion.' That's the closest you'll get.
• Milky Way candy bar - it's a Three Musketeers bar. They're Milky Way is called a Mars Bar, which we have here but it's not the same thing.
• T. K. Maxx - T. J. Maxx. That's self-explanatory.

I'm sure there were a few other things too but I can't think of them. I took pictures of the most random shit, so I'm sure there are pictures of the alternate named things. We also found out that peanut butter isn't really popular over there. We stayed in Cowbridge and occasionally ventured into Cardiff, and we couldn't find a single store selling peanut butter. When we went to England, the friends we stayed with claimed to have bought some recently but I wasn't shown a jar so I don't believe it.

The cottage we stayed in was what one would call 'charming.' (It really was too.) It's a converted 17th century stable, aptly named The Old Stables. There were skylights in every room but the master bedroom, there was even one in the shower. Not in the bathroom, but the shower itself. It wasn't very big but I would say it was slightly larger than cozy. Were two people to live together in it for an extended period I don't think they would kill each other. (That's a new measurement of space. Feel free to use it.) One floor, wood floors in the living room and bedrooms (of which there were two) and the original stone slabs in the kitchen and bathroom. We even had a tiny washer in the kitchen. And the kitchen was better stocked than ours, utensil and flatware wise. There were four cutting boards. Who is cutting that much stuff and doesn't have the time to rinse the board off?
Oh, unfortunately I'm mildly allergic to the pillows and comforters we had. I thought they were just generic feather-stuffed, turns out they were legit goose-down. Also turns out I'm legit allergic to that shit. I didn't realize that though until we got back and I had good lighting in the bathroom to see my freaked out face. My sinuses were all wacky, I thought, from the weather and whatnot, so when I would wake up with watery eyes or a scratchy throat I just chalked it up to sinus stuff. But no, I was slowly suffocating every night. I know this not because I went to a doctor when I came home but because I saw the strange red spots around my eyes and jumped to a conclusion, which I'm okay with.
My eyes aren't swollen anymore and the red spots are going away so I'm sure there's no reason to see a medical professional.

We ate at a McDonald's (I know, how exotic) and Jeremy ordered nuggets and asked for honey but they misheard him and gave him curry. They frickin' love curry over there. Everyone thinks they love their fish 'n chips, and they do, but they are also crazy for Indian food. We talked about trying it and I was all for it but Jeremy's not very adventurous when it comes to food so we never did. He says it's because he wasn't blown away by the curry sauce at McDonald's, which is like saying you don't want to try steak because you didn't care for the burgers. The point being that McDonald's is not the standard for you to make good eating decisions by. Maybe we would've loved Indian food. Now we'll never know. (Cause I don't know where there's an Indian restaurant around here.)

We saw a bunch of castles, some of them in ruins but still preserved enough that you can walk around in them without fear of slipping and dying. One of them we actually walked to from our cottage. Not that it was just down the street but it was close enough, and we walked like crazy over there. We surmised that we walked more in the two weeks we were there than in two months here. Even when we went into Cardiff, we parked in a garage and spent the day in town. It's so hard to find parking, or just to maneuver a car there in general, it's easier just to either park in a garage, or take public transport. We did the first because we rented a car, but if we had known before what we know now we would just rely on buses and taxis. It didn't help that Jeremy was the only one who could drive (it would've been super expensive to add me because I'm just a young 'in.) so we had to rent a standard sized car, which doesn't seem that bad but when you put it in the perspective that the majority of roads are designed for Mini Coopers or similar we had a huge car. And I don't think the people of Wales were very pleased with our large, clearly American car taking up their road. But I wasn't very pleased with their super tiny roads and super aggressive driving habits.

Back to the castles though, these things are just... wherever. It's like instead of clearing space they just build around existing objects, which would certainly explain the roads. Cardiff Castle is literally right in the middle of downtown Cardiff. We were walking on a street and on one side is a grocery store, a Burger King (do not eat at the Burger King near Morgan Arcade. It's filthy and the meat tastes weird.) and then all of a sudden a castle. Well, a castle wall. Jeremy asked if it was a castle and I was like, ' Jeremy I'm sure there isn't a castle just in the middle of town.'
Turns out there is. It's on Castle Street, or Avenue, whichever it's still a castle just hanging out downtown. And nobody really seemed to notice it. It was a little disheartening. I mean, I know these people live there and they see it everyday, but still the way they just walked on by like it wasn't an important construct or relevant to their present state of life was a little bit like a slap in the face. I saw these things and I wanted to tell people about them but everyone who wasn't clearly a tourist with a camera and a European man bag (we saw quite a few of those) had this attitude that made me feel like I was inferior to them for finding something incredible.
Pompous Welsh. Your land was founded on coal, you're not better than me!

That's all I've got for now, but obviously a bunch of other stuff happened. I knew I should've kept writing while we were away. I kept a paper journal, why didn't I just keep a digital one?